I remember being at a slumber party when I was about 14 and the question was asked amongst the group, "Who is your dream guy?"
I recall being embarrassed that I didn't have an answer to this question.
Dream Guy? Really, I am suppose to be thinking about a dream guy at 14?! I was already consumed with correctly wearing Forenza and Outback Red gear that thinking about a
'dream guy' didn't appear on my 14 year old radar!
I knew I wanted someone, eventually, in my life that loved me and cherished me. Someone who treated me with kindness and maybe purchased me a few diamonds and cute shoes along the way. In my thinking...
what girl wouldn't want that.
I was not thinking what my girlfriends were that night. "Doctor!" replied one. "Rich." another. "Massive muscles." another said dreamily. "Tall, dark and handsome." chimed another.
Little did I know that God placed my
'dream guy' right underneath my nose.
Here is Matt. (photo circa 1989)
He is tall. He is not dark. (He slathers on more sunscreen than I use in a year :) With his electric blue eyes and genuine smile I find him irresistibly attractive!
We were family friends because of our parents. We did life together long before we knew what doing life really meant. And, somewhere in between family camping, water skiing, and college Matt became my 'dream guy.' (See? Right under my nose) We dated for almost 7 years before he popped the question and we were married on August 9, 1997.
This year marks our 15 year wedding anniversary! There is only one reason why I am so crazy about my dream guy...
For this reason this bride and bridegroom give thanks
to the LORD Almighty for the LORD is good;
his love endures forever.
Jeremiah 33:11
Being married has called me to confront my selfishness. Marriage is no longer 'what I want' because there is another person to consider. I can't blame or get angry with Matt because of my own ugly attitude or disappointments in life because they are not Matt's to deal with. Admitting my selfishness, disappointments and ugliness is a humbling and hard job. Being married has taught me a self-less love.
Self-less love is what Christ shows us in the Gospels. I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. (John 10:10) My study bible notes, "Life in Christ is lived on a higher plane because of his overflowing forgiveness, love, and guidance." (NIV study bible) Good advice for any relationship, especially marriage!
I believe it is this LOVE that has held and is holding our marriage together! I am more in love with Matt today only because I am more in love with a gracious, merciful, and faithful King who shows me what LOVE is.
Getting here has not been easy. Marriage is work. I know we are not done working at our marriage. What I do know is that because of the self-less love that Christ models we can do marriage because he works within us.
I have my dream guy. He is not rich, nor a doctor. He is not dark or ripped with muscles. Matt loves and cherishes me because of Christ. That's all this girl wants and the diamonds or shoes are just the cherry on top ;)
If married, how long have you been married? What has your marriage taught you?
With a Smile,
Sarah